She’s fourteen
High school has started
It feels like a completely
New wondrous world

Her teachers are different
They are more respectful
Meeting the kids
As if they are adults
Asking them to step into
More of who they are
What they want
Where they want to go

There is more freedom to explore
To become
More naturally
A stronger sense of their
Innately amazing selves
If we allow them to
By meeting them
In a space that is
Void of judgment
Void of presumption
Void of expectation

She is changing
She is trying on new ways of being
She rolls her eyes
Occasionally

When I bring her awareness
To this new behavior
To how it makes me feel
Asking if that was her intent
As I inquire in a way
That is kind
Judgement free
Where I ask
I wonder why you just did that
She apologizes
Sharing that she wasn’t even aware of it
Or the impact it had on me
We move on

She is changing
Her voice is so much louder
As if she wants the entire world
To know her story
To know her existence
To become aware that she is getting
Stronger, mightier, happier
With who she is becoming

Truth is
Her loudness
At times
Drives me a little crazy
It feels like
She is boring a hole
Into the side of my head
I often times ask

Can you bring it down
I often times
Roll my eyes
At her new behavior
Then catch myself
As I am doing
The very thing
To her
That we just spoke about
The day before

I apologize
I ask her to bring it to my attention
Next time too
As I step back
As I witness
Her desire to be heard
Even more then before
As I share
That it might be easier
For others to hear
If it was just a bit lower
At times
But not always
As she is changing

She is changing
As she walks down the stairs
Ready for school
Wearing less clothes
Then she did before
Her belly is showing
Her shorts a bit too short
And yet
She glides off the bottom step
Her shoulders are held high
As she obviously
Feels beautiful
Confident in her body
Ready to show the world
How she is growing

It’s just that I
Her mother
Am realizing the ever growing
Need
To pause
To take a moment
To take a breath
Meet her where she is
In this time of growth
From the desire to
Share my opinion
On how I believe
There are other factors
To take into consideration

We discuss
The wardrobe
Not from a place of shaming
How she feels
What she wants to wear
Or why she has made the choice
She has made

But instead
We discuss
The wardrobe
From my perspective of importance
Does it match your objective today
As she is going to school
Which is her only job
Is this appropriate for that

We discuss even more
From her perspective
As she shares
How everyone dresses like this
That there is no school rule
Against it

I hear her
She hears me
As we discuss
What works for us both
For what the intention of the day is
For how she wants to feel in her body

We come to a compromise
One that makes her feel good
In who she is choosing to present to the world
And one that makes me feel good
About being her mom
About helping to guide the way

Soon she turns
Walks back up the stairs
Adjusts her outfit for the day
No argument
No eye roll
No problem

For she is changing
Into a beautiful
Young woman
Who loves her body

I can only say
I wish I would have
Felt the same
At that age
How wonderful
That would have been
How wonderful I intend
For it to remain
For her
As we navigate this
New territory
These new choices
Together

She is changing
During this time of life
And I welcome it
Completely
For it is
Fascinating
Exciting
Surreal
As I recognize that
As she grows into
Her adult self
As I let go of
Being the mother
To a child
As I hold onto
Intentions
Love
Support
It is then and only then
That I can meet her
On this road
To adulthood
From a place of acceptance
Opportunity
Profound growth
For us both

For she is changing
And I am committed to
Being her mother
Being her champion
Being the witness to
The incredible evolution
Of her becoming
A woman